Considering the site this poll was on I would have expected at least 50% saying absolutely.
Roam - 14 years ago
Do people like sex - yes. Is it OK too have sex if you are not in a relationship - yes.
Is it OK to have sex with a person you are in a relationship with - yes.
Is it OK to have sex with other people if you are in a relationship and you partner wants you to watch you have sex with them - oh yes.
It is the best fun you can have without your cloths on.
Ward - 14 years ago
Never been a question. My first marriage was a polyandry. (Broke up after six years when my co-husband went sociopathic, nowadays he'a a born-again asshole). Ten years later, when I switched coasts, I spent a few weeks staying with our ex-wife and her husband. They introduced me to one of his ex-lovers and La Esposa and I have been together almost eighteen years. And yes, the four of us are more than just friends. Whatever goes on in private between any number of consenting adults in whatever mix of genders is none of the business of the government or anybody who claims to speak for God.
quinny621 - 15 years ago
Thank you Autum for your comments... I am atempting to be open-minded to give my husband the same thing that you have given your boyfriend. I am attempting not be to be jealous and placing great effort to watch him enjoy himself sexually. Its only one thing, He wants it with someone that I really don't have any trust in...He is attached to her and he has been seeing her for the last two years.... He said he only want her...We swing with other couples but he don't get anyting out of it. I noitce that you said you enjoy your boyfriend making love to the other woman. How did you get there? How did you keep from feeling jealous and enny that she was making him feel better than you? How did you gain more confidence to allow this to take place without you being in the room anytime he wants. My husband is an obessive extremeous person. If he like something he wants it all the time. He is possessive and controlling. He wants to have a poly relationship, but I can't bring myself to do it. I want him happy...Now that I have a place I can share how I feel. Our communication level on a scale 1to 10 is maybe a 3 or 4 when it comes to this topic. However today we were able to have an open dialogue about it in detailed and I finally told him how I felt. He said I was micromanaging him becuxz I won't allow him to have my ex-best friend to be with us. I don't mind another woman but not her. When I think of them two together it reminds me of the pain that cause us to get in the lifestyle in the first place. It makes me think that he is still trying to get revenge for me cheating on him. He know with any other woman I don't care if he makes oral love to her or have regular sex.. It don't bother me. But with her its like a knive driving thru my heart. It HURTS like hell......However he says that I am stressing him out, he is depress becus I won't commit to or give him my blessing to do this. Can you give me anything/encouragement to aid in me allowing him to have his cake and ice cream and eat it to.....
Autumn - 15 years ago
I read Jason's comment, and I absolutely agree with him in all respects. My partner and I are considering swinging. So far, we have had one threesome with another woman. It went far better than I had imagined it could, and I am very pleased with the whole experiance. We both are! I am not jealous at all, in fact, I actually wanted my boyfriend to HAVE feelings for the other woman... Not "be in love" with her feelings, although that would be ok too, as long as it didn't take his love away from me. The point being, that I didn't just want to see my boyfriend FUCK another woman.... No... I wanted to see him Make Love with her, with feelings and passion. For lack of any other way to describe it, call it infatuation.. I wanted to see him on an emotional HIGH during the experiance, because his passion inflames my own. Because I love my boyfriend so completely, I can not concieve of denying him pleasure... I want to give him all the pleasure I can, and I am willing to provide him this pleasure vicariously through other people. Allowing him to be aroused and turned on with another woman is nothing short of a loving act on my part. I felt very loving at the time that it occured, and still do weeks afterwards. My love and affection was so bursting out of me that it in fact even spilled over onto her as well. I had tender loving feelings towards the other woman as well. Both my boyfriend and I cared about her feelings and her pleasure... But I am sure that the reason that our experiance went so well, was because I know my partner loves me entirely, and I love him the same way... Therefore, we both feel very secure in our relationship. And seriously, think about it.... Why would my partner ever leave me, or stop loving me to be with another woman, if he is free to have the other woman and me at the same time? If our relationship is fulfilling all of his emotional and sexual needs, then what on earth could be out there to threaten it?
Well call me weird, but this is how I feel about it... Right or wrong, good or bad, this is how I feel.
He on the other hand, is not quite sure he feels ok about seeing me having sex with another man... I can analize it to death, trying to figure out why... but does it really make any difference? It is how he feels period! Naturally, I respect this. I could not enjoy an experiance with another man if I knew it was making my boyfriend feel uncomfortable... Once again.. My passion hinges on his...
So, having discussed all of this in depth together, we are still toying with the idea of swinging with another couple, but we will proceed slowly, and only if it feels right for both of us. The one thing we do know is that having a threesome with another woman is all good, so that is an avenue that is open to us. And hey! If it works for both of us, then Great!
And again, as Jason wrote about... Just the idea of swinging, and talking about it and being so open and honest, HAS greatly benefited our relationship. Whether or not we ever do swing with another couple isn't really important. It's the love and open honesty that has been brought to light that is the real benefit for us.
I just saw this comment, but what he said could not be more true.
Whether or not you ever have sex with anyone other than your partner - Swingers just have more fun! They are open minded, sexy, and typically in very happy relationships.
The one thing I love about the Swingtown show is that the Swingers are the only well adjusted and happy couple on the whole show... LOL
Jason - 16 years ago
As a man, of course I have had fantasies about group sex. However, I never suspected that my wife would be into it. She started watching that Swingtown show and then one night our best friends were over and they regularly spend the night. On this particular evening we had all gone to bed (separate rooms) and my wife and I, as usual, were topping off the night with some great sex. Only this time she starts talking dirty about our friends and the fantasies she had about both of them. All I can say is what she said both surprised me and turned me on something fierce. I had never even considered the lifestyle or realized how many people are into it until I started looking into it after that night. Even before we put any effort into contacting other like minded couples the open nature of this kind of communication immediately improved our already awesome relationship. I mean there is not much more beyond your most intimate sexual fantasies and when you are feeling comfortable talking about those, well anything goes and all of a sudden you trust and love your mate even more than you ever thought possible. Nothing is hidden and you have complete trust in each other to just put it all out there without fear.
We have met a couple through one of the many sites out there. I was discouraged at first, because as a newbie the internet is very scary and there are nothing but pictures of bits and pieces every where! I mean don't get me wrong, I LOVE bits and pieces, but when your looking for a couple to share the love of your life with.... They better be very special! Well I can say they are out there! We have had one date with this couple so far and we are all taking it slow. Nothing sexual happened, but were up till 5 am talking about what we all wanted out of this and what are rules were and stuff. It was a very fun and enlightening evening to say the least. I actually was just texting with the male half and we are all planning to get together tonight. Decidedly we are all not quite ready for a full swap, so we are just going to do some heavy petting and then some same room with our own partners.
The point of my comment here is to say that so far swinging (even though we have'nt yet) and the communication, team spirit and trust that it takes to swing is nothing but a good thing for those that are ready. Adventure, friendship, pleasure, absolute trust and communication like you never had before await! And that is before you ever even Swing, which is my point. Sometimes it takes a taboo subject to open up unknown routes of communication and intimacy. I mean even if we never go all the way with another couple the benefits are already clear. You just need to find people that are on the same page as you. Good luck and have safe fun!
Considering the site this poll was on I would have expected at least 50% saying absolutely.
Do people like sex - yes. Is it OK too have sex if you are not in a relationship - yes.
Is it OK to have sex with a person you are in a relationship with - yes.
Is it OK to have sex with other people if you are in a relationship and you partner wants you to watch you have sex with them - oh yes.
It is the best fun you can have without your cloths on.
Never been a question. My first marriage was a polyandry. (Broke up after six years when my co-husband went sociopathic, nowadays he'a a born-again asshole). Ten years later, when I switched coasts, I spent a few weeks staying with our ex-wife and her husband. They introduced me to one of his ex-lovers and La Esposa and I have been together almost eighteen years. And yes, the four of us are more than just friends. Whatever goes on in private between any number of consenting adults in whatever mix of genders is none of the business of the government or anybody who claims to speak for God.
Thank you Autum for your comments... I am atempting to be open-minded to give my husband the same thing that you have given your boyfriend. I am attempting not be to be jealous and placing great effort to watch him enjoy himself sexually. Its only one thing, He wants it with someone that I really don't have any trust in...He is attached to her and he has been seeing her for the last two years.... He said he only want her...We swing with other couples but he don't get anyting out of it. I noitce that you said you enjoy your boyfriend making love to the other woman. How did you get there? How did you keep from feeling jealous and enny that she was making him feel better than you? How did you gain more confidence to allow this to take place without you being in the room anytime he wants. My husband is an obessive extremeous person. If he like something he wants it all the time. He is possessive and controlling. He wants to have a poly relationship, but I can't bring myself to do it. I want him happy...Now that I have a place I can share how I feel. Our communication level on a scale 1to 10 is maybe a 3 or 4 when it comes to this topic. However today we were able to have an open dialogue about it in detailed and I finally told him how I felt. He said I was micromanaging him becuxz I won't allow him to have my ex-best friend to be with us. I don't mind another woman but not her. When I think of them two together it reminds me of the pain that cause us to get in the lifestyle in the first place. It makes me think that he is still trying to get revenge for me cheating on him. He know with any other woman I don't care if he makes oral love to her or have regular sex.. It don't bother me. But with her its like a knive driving thru my heart. It HURTS like hell......However he says that I am stressing him out, he is depress becus I won't commit to or give him my blessing to do this. Can you give me anything/encouragement to aid in me allowing him to have his cake and ice cream and eat it to.....
I read Jason's comment, and I absolutely agree with him in all respects. My partner and I are considering swinging. So far, we have had one threesome with another woman. It went far better than I had imagined it could, and I am very pleased with the whole experiance. We both are! I am not jealous at all, in fact, I actually wanted my boyfriend to HAVE feelings for the other woman... Not "be in love" with her feelings, although that would be ok too, as long as it didn't take his love away from me. The point being, that I didn't just want to see my boyfriend FUCK another woman.... No... I wanted to see him Make Love with her, with feelings and passion. For lack of any other way to describe it, call it infatuation.. I wanted to see him on an emotional HIGH during the experiance, because his passion inflames my own. Because I love my boyfriend so completely, I can not concieve of denying him pleasure... I want to give him all the pleasure I can, and I am willing to provide him this pleasure vicariously through other people. Allowing him to be aroused and turned on with another woman is nothing short of a loving act on my part. I felt very loving at the time that it occured, and still do weeks afterwards. My love and affection was so bursting out of me that it in fact even spilled over onto her as well. I had tender loving feelings towards the other woman as well. Both my boyfriend and I cared about her feelings and her pleasure... But I am sure that the reason that our experiance went so well, was because I know my partner loves me entirely, and I love him the same way... Therefore, we both feel very secure in our relationship. And seriously, think about it.... Why would my partner ever leave me, or stop loving me to be with another woman, if he is free to have the other woman and me at the same time? If our relationship is fulfilling all of his emotional and sexual needs, then what on earth could be out there to threaten it?
Well call me weird, but this is how I feel about it... Right or wrong, good or bad, this is how I feel.
He on the other hand, is not quite sure he feels ok about seeing me having sex with another man... I can analize it to death, trying to figure out why... but does it really make any difference? It is how he feels period! Naturally, I respect this. I could not enjoy an experiance with another man if I knew it was making my boyfriend feel uncomfortable... Once again.. My passion hinges on his...
So, having discussed all of this in depth together, we are still toying with the idea of swinging with another couple, but we will proceed slowly, and only if it feels right for both of us. The one thing we do know is that having a threesome with another woman is all good, so that is an avenue that is open to us. And hey! If it works for both of us, then Great!
And again, as Jason wrote about... Just the idea of swinging, and talking about it and being so open and honest, HAS greatly benefited our relationship. Whether or not we ever do swing with another couple isn't really important. It's the love and open honesty that has been brought to light that is the real benefit for us.
I just saw this comment, but what he said could not be more true.
Whether or not you ever have sex with anyone other than your partner - Swingers just have more fun! They are open minded, sexy, and typically in very happy relationships.
The one thing I love about the Swingtown show is that the Swingers are the only well adjusted and happy couple on the whole show... LOL
As a man, of course I have had fantasies about group sex. However, I never suspected that my wife would be into it. She started watching that Swingtown show and then one night our best friends were over and they regularly spend the night. On this particular evening we had all gone to bed (separate rooms) and my wife and I, as usual, were topping off the night with some great sex. Only this time she starts talking dirty about our friends and the fantasies she had about both of them. All I can say is what she said both surprised me and turned me on something fierce. I had never even considered the lifestyle or realized how many people are into it until I started looking into it after that night. Even before we put any effort into contacting other like minded couples the open nature of this kind of communication immediately improved our already awesome relationship. I mean there is not much more beyond your most intimate sexual fantasies and when you are feeling comfortable talking about those, well anything goes and all of a sudden you trust and love your mate even more than you ever thought possible. Nothing is hidden and you have complete trust in each other to just put it all out there without fear.
We have met a couple through one of the many sites out there. I was discouraged at first, because as a newbie the internet is very scary and there are nothing but pictures of bits and pieces every where! I mean don't get me wrong, I LOVE bits and pieces, but when your looking for a couple to share the love of your life with.... They better be very special! Well I can say they are out there! We have had one date with this couple so far and we are all taking it slow. Nothing sexual happened, but were up till 5 am talking about what we all wanted out of this and what are rules were and stuff. It was a very fun and enlightening evening to say the least. I actually was just texting with the male half and we are all planning to get together tonight. Decidedly we are all not quite ready for a full swap, so we are just going to do some heavy petting and then some same room with our own partners.
The point of my comment here is to say that so far swinging (even though we have'nt yet) and the communication, team spirit and trust that it takes to swing is nothing but a good thing for those that are ready. Adventure, friendship, pleasure, absolute trust and communication like you never had before await! And that is before you ever even Swing, which is my point. Sometimes it takes a taboo subject to open up unknown routes of communication and intimacy. I mean even if we never go all the way with another couple the benefits are already clear. You just need to find people that are on the same page as you. Good luck and have safe fun!