Vote in last week's caption contest

Aaahhhh...a nice clean slate, no accusations of cheating or anything, isn't it pretty?

It took awhile, but I found three much better ones than selected last week: (Remember, the lady is speaking about the masked teller with a gun, to the line behind her.) "Well, this certainly is stimulating", Stuart from MB; "When did they start letting congressmen work as bank tellers?, Richard from La Grange; and J. Mark's best effort, "I've always liked Penn better!"

Of course, mine were also better than the three selected, and we know that the best one is a popularity contest, and means nothing.

The three picked by the caption panel again amplifies their laziness: The "winner" was the 7th entry, 2nd place was the 3rd, 3rd was the 5th.

None the staff selected was even worth voting for.

Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

Ok I have been quite long enough and normally I don't like commenting on and for wastes of space like this steve guy, but DUDE shut the heck up and go away. Your captions make no sense, and you have no sense of reality. The people on here that do enter captions and manage to get them picked obviously know the crowd and how to write. So why don't you go back to turning oxygen into carbon dioxide and leave this to the people that can write.

Amen to that Truck Driver! Way to comment Brian. Steve, thank you for your input, I look forward to your 'interesting interpretation' of each week's caption.

Well I suppose it was too much to hope for, mister "my thoughts are the only thing that counts and nobody else is valid because they are not me" is at it again. DUDE, get the F off this site, the caption contest is obviously just not for you. Why not make your own website and have your own contest that only you can enter and only you can win because that's obviously the only way you will ever be satisfied. Lookie here, two weeks in a row I didn't get picked and wow I'm not complaining. The only gripes I have are connected with the bowel movements spewing out of your mouth via your fingers here. Honestly, your maturity level astounds me (and many others by the looks of it). I am going to say this one last time, WRITE FOR YOUR AUDIENCE, not the voices in your head, you whiney little &^%$ with a skinned knee.

I'm writing for my audience, and you're responding! As noted, it's just my opinion, based on facts I've gathered. <+>

I didn't notice your entry on the list of last week's players, B. You can't win if you don't enter...<+>

With the teller cartoon, just wanted to give Becca some ink! Her (?) best caption IMHO was "I told you we should have just used the ATM."<+>

And shout outs to David Peraza and Kevin Woolley for their efforts. Two of over a hundred better than "The Lazy Three"!<+>

When you're pro-active, or provocative, you gotta hope for reaction. Thanks for your responses to my stimulus, commenters!

It's a beautiful day! Love and peace, Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

Oh my gosh, Steve, why you letting these people harsh your mellow? You are totally right, it is a really nice day! Who's this Becca, I didn't see a comment from that person, but like totally, these others are completely mean to you.

Valley Gal, you are coming in on the tail end of 3 weeks of nothing but bitching and griping by this asinine guy, Steve who came out and actually said that the Tribune was cheating when his garbage wasn't selected, then made comments about making jokes about 9/11, and so much self-righteous whining about how he's the only person who has any taste that writes captions (the examples he has sent in are purely tasteless and stuff that the Tribune would never publish anyways) and that his should be picked because they are so much better than anyone else's. The captions are erased and blanked out every week when the new captions come out, so should you have seen what he's written the past few weeks, you would also be sitting here hoping the earth swallows him alive for being the biggest piece of trash in California except for Lindsay Lohan

Steve, I submit one a week, not endless dribble like you do, and the only reason anyone responds to your oral bowel movements on here is to give people a reality check before they believe anything you say, you are officially the Rush Limbaugh of the Central Coast, you egotistical self-righteous, one sided pig.

Like who is Rush Limbaugh? I totally found a Brian R caption and I totally liked it! Like why would Steve be so harsh? I like completely enjoy this contest. I'm not a writer, like at all, but I totally like reading all this stuff and junk. Is Steve, like talking about the Becca who totally rocks and wins all the time because she is like totally awesome and junk? If he is dumping on her then he is just totally not cool! She is one of my favorites. I like totally some of the stuff this like J Mark guy posted.

Valley Girl, as one who hasn't written in on here, I would like to say you're right, there are so many fun responses on here and for this guy to keep badmouthing everybody because his wasn't picked is just silly, what's the point? You keep plugging until you get it right then keep doing what you did and chances are you'll just keep getting picked regularly. And seriously, what was up with accusing Nash of filling his email with junk last week?

Thanks, Craig!

Becca is the reason I started submitting captions! He/she is the all-time caption champ, and all I can say is I totally admire her spunk! <=> Another enterer I really like is Dale from Paso. Check his stuff out... <=> My detractors have no sense of humor, and when the rules say "submit a humorous caption", I say find the 3 funniest, not the 3 easiest. <=> And c'mon guys, calling me the Rush Limbaugh of the Central Coast makes me smile and get all warm inside. I may have to tie one half of my brain behind my back before I submit another caption! <=> Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

She is like totally the bomb! Or the captionator...lol like the govenator...lol I wonder why they call him that.

no the warm sensation you feel is the pod person gestating in your colon you twisted twerp

Wow, that was totally buzz kill and kind of harsh, but I shot milk out of my nose, like all the way across the room!

Hey, I'm new to this site, but from a quick study all I can say is, Steve, you ain't never gonna be popular, so get over it!

The truth is never popular. Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

Neither is herpes, think that's a little closer to your truth

Steve, if the culmination of your being is to be the lone truth in a small town paper's caption contest, and you're gonna keep whining about not winning and accusing guys of filling your email with garbage, what does that say about you? Sounds like some pretty low sites you have set in life...go get a turtle

I like totally had a turtle, we called him turtley, he was totally awesome. One day we couldn't find him and I completely couldn't believe it. He totally ran away. My way cute neighbor found him in his yard and then like saw our poster and we got our turtle back. It was completely awesome! We renamed him Speedy because he totally almost got away and stuff!

All I can say is WOW!

LOL

Steve, Thank you for the props, however, I think your references to the 9/11 incident were completely inappropriate and shameful. If you are trying to get a negative reaction, then get busy, you are on track...Don't do me any more favors.

Oh, by the way Steve, totally lose the Valley Girl personna...

I completely agree with dale, steve's coments regarding 9/11 went way to far and were way out of line. In my opinion he should be banned for the caption contest for good. We all got to remember he (steve) lives in a world of his own where he is king schmuck and everyone else is an umpa lumpa. It seems from his comments that he has nothing better to do than complain about other peoples entries because he is not smart enough to write something better than pure dog vomit.

Time to analyze the "humorous" finalists in this week's voting. "Wall Street, here we come!" is the epitome of the I-Can't-Wait-To-Get-There schtick, a rip-off if you will of "California, here I come". It's actually the only one of the three that has some humor in it, albeit gallowish. This is of course the cartoon that reminded me of the jumpers out of the burning towers on 9/11. Bad taste, I think, in opening that wound. The second and third captions do not match up to the cartoon: #2 would not have happy faces saying that line, they would have fear on their faces-- so it's not funny. Remember this is a "humorous" caption contest. #3 would have to find a harness for a parachute somewhere on the man talking, or he left it inside the window he's jumped from. But again it's just a cartoon, where when they hit the pavement, they become flat as pancakes, and someone will come by and peel them up and reinflate them or some such. We'll discuss some of the better answers next week, when the full field of responses appear. Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

Okay here we go yet again, give it a rest, steve. This is officially no longer about the cartoons. You aren't a shrink and are definitely not credible enough or based enough in the rest of ours' would to count as a critic of editorial cartoons. Let's analyze what you had to say today since you obviously didn't take my advise in getting a turtle to take up your excessive free time; a rip off of California here I come? Are you honestly singing that song when you read that line? if you take caption one as a song, then tell the voices in your head to turn down the music, as us human beings are seeing nothing of the sort when we read it, we see a belated wall street crashing joke plain and simple. Should the writers of two and three have gone to the tribune and demanded a terrified face reprint so that their comments made sense to you and only you? If your answer is yes, you still just don't get it because this is a simple they print something, you respond, they print, everybody has fun. Who cares where the parachute straps are?
My analysis: you have no life, have a serious superiority complex that is insanely delusional, and I hope that you have some kind of job where you make very little impact and have very little people contact.
I like the way you instantly jump to putting quotations around humorous from the start of your message. Honestly if you have that much contempt for your fellow man, how are you not breathing through a tube? Darwin would rule someone with your kind of people skills as the type to be selected against in nature. Or is it that you're so truly meek and mild mannered outside your door that you don't put on your big girl panties and lash out at everyone else until you have the safety of your doors locked and your big digital safety net? You know who else liked the safety of his remote house when he could lash out at society? The unibomber...are you the unibomber in your big girl panties in front of the safe screen, Steve?

My fun is definitely different than your fun, B. You're starting to sound like an old man with health problems projecting into other's comments. Steve Schumann -- Arroyo Grande -- theschu2@aol.com

No, just you Steve. Your fun is bagging on everybody else in an attempt to compensate for something. I'm just here to keep a jackass like you in check. I submit my one comment a week and enjoy seeing what they pick. You have to sit here and badmouth everybody else because they didn't pick you and that the humor isn't up to your standards. I told you how to get picked as a finalist, yet rather than accept how this contest is run, you have to stick to your losing ways and bitch and gripe about every little thing with how the paper is run and how everyone else is below you. Now who's the old man with health problems? Well no, not going to rag on the elderly...you're just the little crying twerp with the skinned knee

I love these banal exchanges. People, get a clue...it's meaningless!

Dale I'm with you in that the contest is essentially meaningless. But have you read the stuff Steve's said the past several weeks? I'm glad there's at least a few who don't have a problem putting a jerk in his place. There's some things he's said that truly are unforgivable and I have to say I hope he gets what's he deserves.

Keep it coming, my brothers in slime! Steve and you have the rest!

Um...wow...yeah...

Hi all, I have been reading the comments for the past couple months and have a question for Steve: Why do you wait until Saturday, when the Trib publishes the names of the finalists, to comment on the finalists? It would be nice to see your opinion on the selected captions before the names are published, not after. That way we could get a view that isn't skewed by your knowledge of who the author is. Just food for thought, I am sure you will have plenty to say in answer as well as those who vehemently disagree with most of what you post.

I would say its a valid question for ya, Steve. Why aren't you deciding to bash everybody on Friday? Or Thursday night for that matte...

wow...silence lol

He comments right away on anything adversarial, but someone asks him a real question and we don't hear a word out of Steve. Interesting.

Like, my turtle is totally interesting and totally not slimy at all.